aNewDomain — There’s plenty of collateral damage in today’s hook-up app world. Sometimes tragedy strikes, but usually digital dating first encounters are just so awkward. Tinder takes the cake when it comes to awkward and sometimes scary love-gone-wrong experiences. Founded in 2012, Tinder uses your Facebook profile, GPS technology and the simple swipe — left for pass, right if you like — to create semi-romantic encounters.
Post-swipe is when things get interesting. I decided to delve into the annals of AskReddit to find some of the worst Tinder stories out there, and I’ve listed five below. These will make you laugh, and cringe, and possibly get rid of that too-often-clicked app, so be warned.
1. I think 80 texts after the first date means she loves you, man.
“It was horrible. I installed the app for fun and just to eff around with when I’m bored, ended up matching with a girl and talked to her for, like, two weeks and exchanged numbers and FB info. She was pretty, seemed really cool, and we shared a lot in common. Eventually she said we should hang out, and I said sure. We met up at a mall and just walked around and talked for about an hour, and I left. After I left, I knew I wasn’t going to pursue her. Over text she seemed pretty cool, but in person she was just … off. IDK, I can’t really explain it.
“Anyway, within two minutes of me getting back in the car, she texted me wanting to know my real opinion on her now. Kinda weird, but whatever she seems weird so I just replied saying yeah, she’s cool and whatever. Big mistake. Over the course of the next two hours, I received over 80 texts, about 10 calls and a couple of VMs, all of her crying and saying I need to move in with her and her Dad because she’s suicidal and I needed to take care of her. I was blunt with her in saying no and this can’t go on anymore and to stop contacting me, but nothing changed. I had to delete my FB profile, block her number, etc. I deleted the app after that.”
— Reddit user Joskilatrix
2. Not even crickets will make a noise.
“I’ve had tinder for 16 months and have still yet to get a message. Not even from spambots.”
— Reddit user Bk7
3. Stalking is sexy, right?
“My friend met a girl on Tinder while in Paris for a weekend. They kept talking a little bit after he went home to Amsterdam. She asked his address so she could send a birthday card. She effing showed up on his birthday!
“She texted him while he was at work saying she was at his front door and he thought she must be joking but he was in a meeting and unable to call her for two hours. He said it was the longest two hours of his life. When he found out she was serious he was shocked. He had to invite her along to dinner with his family and then his friends had a small party for him and she brought a cake. He let her sleep on his couch (played the “I’m a gentleman” card) and luckily he had a business trip the next day so he had an excuse to ask her to leave. She recently called him to say she was getting ready for a date and had nothing to wear. Crazy.
“Told him I posted this story and he corrected me: he let her have the bed and he slept on the couch which was awkward because they had already slept together in Paris.”
— Reddit user FriendVriendin
4. Tinder works for solicitation. What? It does!
“‘I’m looking to make $40 today. Do you think that’s something you could help me with?’ Uhhh no thanks.”
— Reddit user biCamelKase
5. Kid movies are romantic, right?
“I met up with a girl so we could watch ‘Frozen’ together. We actually watched ‘Frozen’ together. She was disappointed and I was mesmerized. I’d never seen that shit before.”
— Reddit user Systemizer
For aNewDomain, I’m Raquel Cool.
Cover image: See-ming Lee via Flickr Creative Commons
First image: Tim Downs for aNewDomain
Editor: A version of this article ran on aNewDomain’s BreakingModern.